I have been having strange thoughts about my mom, and they're scaring the hell out of me. It started innocently enough—just noticing how she takes care of herself, how she still turns heads at her age, how her laughter fills a room. But lately, my mind has been wandering into territory that feels completely wrong. When she hugs me, I find myself hyper-aware of her body pressed against mine, and I have to force myself to pull away. Last week, I caught myself staring at her lips while she was talking, and I had this fleeting, intrusive thought about what it would be like to kiss her. I feel disgusted with myself after these thoughts, like there's something fundamentally broken inside me. I've started avoiding being alone with her, making excuses to leave the room when she's around. I know this is probably some twisted Oedipal thing or maybe just loneliness manifesting in the most inappropriate way possible, but that knowledge doesn't make the thoughts go away. I'm terrified that one day I might act on these impulses, or worse, that she can see what I'm thinking whenever I look at her now.